Hi, I'm Delainha.
 I was born and raised south of Toronto. 
I spent a year living in London, England
and currently live in QLD Australia,
travelling the world one country at a time.  
Thank you for visiting my page,
and remember, always choose happiness, whatever it may be xx

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JULY 2015 - AUGUST 2016

LONDON "THE NANNY DIARY"

In 2015 I made the move to England, a country I had never visted. I packed 1 suit case, and bought a 1 way ticket and moved in with a family I had never met before. I turned my back on everything I had ever known, even though I thought I had the rest of my life figured out. I started a career as a live-in Au Pair and cared for 3 children (the first family I worked for). Due to unfortuntate events, I decided to leave the family I was working for and living with, and gave it a go with a second family. History repeated itself and I realised this career choice wasn't for me. Not due to working with children - I absolutley adored them, but due to the fact that I absolutley hated living with families that allowed me no freedom. Although my year in London was a bit rough around the edges, I fell head over heels for the city and traveled to 26 countries within Europe, and even made it to Thailand and Morocco all within 13 months. 

R E A D M O R E

Moving to Europe on my own at the age of 22, wasn't an easy choice and I can't say that I wasn't afraid of letting go of everything I had ever worked for, but it was the best decision I could have ever made for myself. I made friends from all over the world, it opened my eyes to new goals that I wanted to achieve and I proved to myself how independant I really am.

MOVING
TO  EUROPE

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MY REAL LIFE NANNY DIARY

Monday July 6th 2015
After registering with the Global Work & Travel Co and completing two skype interviews, I was offered the position as an Au Pair for a family in central London England. The mum is a financial adviser and the dad is a top lawyer in the UK. They have a 2 year old. 5 year old and a 7 year old that I will be caring for.

Friday July 21st 2015
Today I make the big move to Europe! Following an incredible three day layover in Iceland, it was time to make my way to London. My host family was meant to pick me up from the airport but I got a last minute email from my host mum saying I would need to take the train and a taxi from the airport. They were aware I was pretty nervous about the move, so I was a litle let down, never having really used public transpertation before, I was really hoping theyèd meet me at the airport to help me with all of my things. Finally, once I made it to my new home, I was greeted by them upon my arrival. Aside from me they also have a full time nanny. Along with a cleaner who comes 3 times a week, a gardener and private tutors for the children. We're a work shop managing this couples lives for them. I told my self no matter how bad or hard this may be, it's only one year. I can handle it. I'm here to travel, and that's what I came to do. The house is massive .. 3 spiral staircases that you can look down from the top floor. That's where my bedroom is, along with the children's. I'm in the smallest room of the house. No TV, my bedroom door doesn't even close properly. My host parents explained the alarm system to me. “For the safety of the children” there's a motion sensor that goes off if someone gets to close to the stairwell. This means, once I put the children to bed, I have to stay in my room until morning because the alarm gets activated when my host dad gets home from work every night around 21:00. ​

Monday July 27th 2015
My host mum expected me to know how to get the 7 year old to dance camp today via bus. She told me we were going to do a "mock school run" so I knew how to get the children where they needed to be but that never happened. I have no idea how to use buses, the tube, trains .. I came from a small town where public transit doesn't exist, they knew this. Why would they just throw me into a situation like that?

Friday July 31st 2015
I barley survived my first week. The whole situation is so awkward. No one says good morning to me when I come downstairs, they just give me a list of things that need to be done and go on there way. So much running around with the children since its summer holiday as well. Shouldn't I be getting paid more since they're not in school and I'm working extra hours than what's stated in my contract? 

Sunday August 2nd 2015
The agency sent me an email with a list of other Au Pairs in the area for me to get in touch with. I met up with Morgan (Canadian) Clare (Australian) and Victoria (New Zealand). It was such a breath of fresh air getting out of the house and meeting such genuine girls within my first week of living in London. I explained my situation and they were shocked as they were placed with such amazing host families. I had never been an Au Pair before, I didn't know what to expect. I'm so over whelmed and stressed about what I just got myself into.

Saturday August 8th 2015
I spent 12 days in Tuscany Italy with my host family. It consisted of working from 7 am when the baby woke until 9 pm when the oldest went to bed, along with cleaning up after my drunk host parents and catering to their every want and need. I wasn't an Au Pair. I was a personal slave
.
Thursday September 3rd 2015
I was suppose to finish work at 19:00 every day. Why is that every night by the time the children watch a bit of tele after dinner I'm the one putting them to bed at 20:30 even though my host mum is home from work? She's too busy polishing off a bottle of wine to herself. A complete drunk. She could care less if I worked past the time I was suppose to. I could have easily been making an extra 100 pounds per week. She doesn't spend time with her children when she's home. They're seeking attention desperately which is why they always act out. They don't listen to me .. they're awful to me. Anytime I ask the 7 year old to do something she tells me "My family is rich and we can fire you." The 5 year old pushed me into oncoming traffic earlier in the week because I didn't buy him ice cream after school.

Thursday September 17th
The Nanny got me in touch with a lady who was looking for a sitter during the day. She hired me to work through out the week from 10am-2pm (while my kids were in school, perfect for my schedule). She's from California and recently moved to London for work. Her 6 month old baby boy that I'm now caring for is the saving grace that helps me get through each day, and since my host parents don't care to know a single thing about me, they don't even know I'm working for another family during the day. I live with them and I swear they don't even know my name.​

Thursday October 1st 2015
It's hard keeping up with everyone back home when I'm working this much, plus the 5 hour time difference. No one really understands what I'm going through. Of course they wouldn't since from what they see on Facebook is photos of how beautiful London is and how much I love the city. I can't let it appear as though I'm dealing with something that I in fact really don't even know how to deal with myself.

Monday October 12th 2015
The last three months of my life have been turned upside down. I feel like a prisoner. How could a part time job take over my life to this extent. My host mum completley drunk off her face 24/7. Bossing me around like she bought me off the street. Making me organise playdates for the children, then when the parents come to collect their kids from the house, my host mum sneaks downstairs from her room (absolutely wasted) and explains to the parents how great they all played together even though she wasn't around for a minute of it. My host dad, a complete ass to me when he is home but never home long enough to to see how drunk his wife gets or see how awful the children are to me. Yelling at me for pouring the last bit of his coffee down the sink when he told me clear the dishes off the kitchen table. Making me run to the shop to buy bread because the sandwich I made for his son out of the end pieces was absolutely ​unacceptable to him. The miss communication between the parents is horrific. They blame every thing on me, even the childrens grades not being good enough. The sly subtle jokes they make about my accent and the way I say things. Asking me to babysit on a Saturday night without notice and having to drop my weekend plans to cater to them and not get paid extra for it. The 7 year old has gotten head lice twice since I've been here. My host mum said "you use to be a hairdresser, you deal with it." Which left me to put treatments on all the childrens scalps, wash all the bedding, sheets and blankets in the entire house not to mention go around collecting every soft toy and bagging them up for two weeks to prevent the lice from spreading. Asking me to go to the shop to get a few odds and ends without paying me back.Blocking all social media sites from their home internet so I couldn't skype or use Facebook to get in touch with family and friends back home. Rather than walking up the stairs to my room to ask me to do something, my host mum would email me asking me to come downstairs. Not providing me with groceries like my contract states. Going 3-4 weeks without being paid when suppose to be paid on a weekly basis. Not "treating me as part of the family." Locking me up in my room at night. The things they expect of me are absurd. The whole situation is a complete joke. I can not actually describe into words how useless they make me feel about myself. My friends can not believe my host family hasn't scared me off to the point where I want to go home. Like hell they're going to be the reason I left Europe. I'm not finished my adventure yet, it hasn't even begun .. 

Saturday October 18th 2015
My friend Joelle's host mum hated hearing that I was having such a stressful and unfair experience so she sent out an email to her daughters nursery to see if any mums were looking for an Au Pair. She really convinced me it was best to find a new family, something I really hadn't thought about. She received heaps of replies, and was kind enough to set up interviews for me.

Monday November 2nd 2015
I have come to the conclusion that I will leave my host family. I decided that following my "two weeks off at Christmas" I will not be returning and have accepted the offer to move in with the family I interviewed with. Since the family can't take me in right after Christmas, this means I will have more than two weeks off. I have booked a 23 day tour across Europe by bus. 13 countries in 23 days. Finally, I can start seeing Europe. The reason I moved here in the first place.

Friday November 13th 2015
I was at Morgan's when I heard the news about Pairs. I'm speechless. My heart shattered. Selfishly enough, all I can think about is how hopefully I'll still be able to go next weekend in which I've booked for my birthday. (I have been in London for 5 months and still have nothing to show for it). I was able to get ahold of my friend Mikaela from Canada who's living in Paris. Most importantly, she reassured me she was safe. Which was all that mattered in that moment.​​  
​​
Sunday November 14th 2015
Travelling home on the tube from Morgans was an experience like no other. The streets and stations were filled with police due to Paris' attack. I felt sick to my stomach listening to the announcements come over the PA systems that voiced "Please report any suspicious behavior." I was on the tube a few stops from home when a man in red hoodie started throwing punches at people shouting he was going to kill us. A sick joke having to do with yesterdays events. Trying to scare us, succeeding, knowing we were trapped underground. I jumped off the tube at the next stop and paced home in tears. One of the scariest moments of my life. The pressure of the last 5 months had caught up with me and I crumbled. After hearing that the boarders were back open I've decided to go through with my trip to Paris. I need a break. I need to clear my head. I'm not allowing all this bullshit to get in my way. I was nervous, a little scared, but mostly bummed that I wasn't excited about my birthday anymore which was the only thing I had to look forward to during my time in that suffocating house.


Saturday November 21st 2015
My 23rd birthday. Walking around the streets of Paris surrounded by French Army men holding their fingers on the trigger of rifles as large as me. I knelt in the Notre Dome Cathedral to say a prayer and couldn't help but shed tears from my eyes. I was devastated for the Parisian community and sad for myself as well. I made the best of my trip to the extent that I could.


Sunday November 29th 2015
I met up with my soon to be host family today to converse about my start date. Following my 23 day tour I still won't be able to move in right away due to home renovations. What am I going to do .. I'm not flying home, it's too expensive. I have family in Romania and Portugal but I can't just ask to stay with them for two weeks. 

Monday December 7th 2015
I purchased an extra suitcase today to pack up everything from my room that I wouldn't need for my tour and start prepping for my run away. I decided I won't be telling my host parents that I'm leaving. I explained my thought process to my agency and they had agreed under the circumstances that since every point on my contract had been broken they would let me deal with the situation as I pleased. Due to being so fearful of the possible treatment I would recieve from my host parents during a four week notice period, I decided I wouldn't be giving one. They didn't deserve it. I told them I was going on a tour around Europe over Christmas and that I would be back the same day they returned from their holiday to Florida. I lied obviously but at least this way over the two weeks they had off they could figure out what they needed to do with me now being gone.

Tuesday December 8th 2015
From the day I leave my current family up until my new host family can take me on I will be without a home for 5.5 weeks. I had 3 weeks of travels filled with my Europe trip arranged, but finally figured out what to do with the remaining time allotted. Today I booked a 10 day island hopping trip to Thailand, my first time to Asia! Somewhere warm, where I could lay on a beach and gather my thoughts. A re-fresh button so to say. 

Friday December 18th 2015
I asked my host parents if they could leave the alarm off tonight. I needed to attend a check in meeting for my tour and since I would be leaving first thing in the morning for my trip I needed the alarm to be deactiviated. I picked the children up from school, said goodbye to them at the house as it would be the last time I would see them (which they didn't know). I had no attachment to them. No relationship was ever formed. I felt horrible and cruel inside, but I wasn't sad saying goodbye to them. They remained at the house with the nanny, who knew my plan all along. I trust her. She despises the family as well. She's planning on leaving right after I do. I showed up to the meeting and met some of the members on tour. We went for drinks at the pub attached to the Hotel meeting place. This made me so eager about leaving tomorrow, but there was so much on my mind. I just want this all over with.

Saturday December 19th 2015
My alarm clock went off at 4:30 am. I quietly zipped up my pajamas into my packed suit case after I got ready, left my keys on the bed and left the house. Finally, I was FREE. I ordered a taxi under my host parents name and charged it to their account. #oops. I arrived at the hotel to board the bus. I skyped my parents to let them know all was well. They were worried sick for me. I was out of there and ready to go on a holiday of a life time. I sent my host parents a long, thought out email listing all the reasons I had left without notice. That they broke every point listed on the contract. They both replied to the emails within just a few short hours. Until this day I still have not read them. That part of my life was over. I had no interest in what they said. The tour was everything I had hoped it would be and more. By far the best three weeks of my life. Visiting Belgium, Netherlands, Germany, Czech Republic, Austria, Poland, Slovakia, Hungary, Slovenia, Italy, Vatican City, Switzerland and France. I made life long friends that I knew I would be making visits to in the near future. I even hit it off with a handsome Australian. I couldn't believe how unexpected it was meeting someone and comparing it to how just a few short weeks ago I was at what felt the lowest point in my life. I was finally happy again.

Tuesday January 12th 2016
I spent one night back in London at Morgans house following the tour. Enough time to change over my luggage to my summer attire to jet off to Thailand for two weeks. I spent hours on end scuba diving, snorkeling, laying on the beach all on my own, appreciating every minute of no longer being in that house and simply enjoying life. 

Sunday January 24th 2016
I moved in with my new host family today. It was bitter sweet meeting their new born baby boy. I'm no longer able to work for the American lady during the day now that I've moved to a different part of London with a different work schedule. I was so devistated when I told her I was moving, but she was happy for me, it was a new beginning. Long, exhausting, story short .. after a month of living with my new family, once again history repeated itself and I'm back in the exact same position as I was before. They've gotten use to having me around and started abusing my role more and more each day. They've proved themselves to be no better or different from my last employers. Not being paid on time. Working through my two hour mandatory break and not being compenstated. Babysititng every Friday night even though they specifically told me the first few months of work wouldn't consist of babysitting since they wouldn't be going out due to the new born (he was only 4 weeks old when I moved in with them). Doing all of the house work and the cooking even though the mum is on MAT leave. Every night that my host mum went out she would ask me to do her hair and never gives me anything in return as a thank you. My host dad walking past me in the mornings without saying hello even If I said it first. Taking my laundry out of the dryer so they could dry their clothes first. Living in the basement with no cell service or access to wifi while I was in my room. Asking me to remain in my room when they had guests over but would ask me to stay up to feed the baby his dream feed so they wouldn't have to leave their friends to do so themselves. Offering me up to their friends to watch their children during the day while they all went to the spa, without getting paid extra. My host parents returning home with friends between 2-4am on their nights out, coming downstairs and blasting the surround sound. It was as if (with both jobs) the roles were reversed. Why at 22/23 years of age am I catering to pathetic losers who shouldn't even have children and not living a life of my own during a time that I should be living it up the most. Do they think that I moved to another country on my own where I knew not a single person to receive treatment such as this? At a time I already feel so alone? To make their lives easier but in return get treated like I'm nothing yet expect me to care for their children? How dare them.

Wednesday February 10th 2016
I decided to talk with my host mum and list to her a few things I was upset about. The conversation was pointless, as she had replied to me saying “we got an Au pair so we could go out on the weekends and continue having a social life, and that's not going to change.” I walked away from the conversation knowing there was no way in hell I was going to last here until my contract finished in December.

Thursday March 17th 2016
I decided that I needed to take charge of my situation. If this was what it was going to be like, I needed to start asking for my holidays and use my time in Europe wisely. I did what anyone would do when living abroad, flew to Ireland for 4 days to celebrate St. Patricks day the right way!

Friday March 25th 2016
Easter break. Four days spent in Edinburgh, Scotland with my two Aussie mates Clare and Georgia visting Castles, climbing Aurthurs Seat, sitting in pubs and avoiding the rain (obviously).​

Saturday April 2nd 2016
Ryan, the Australian that I met on tour at Christmas flew back over to England. His twin sister also lives here, so we all had a solid week of living up the London life. We even snuck over to Paris for a day to enjoy the sites and eat gelato under the Eiffel Tower. Since Australia is where I want to go for my next working visa, we decided to see where things would go between us. 

Sunday May 8th 2016
Today I sold my Jeep. I knew If I wanted to quit this job earlier than intended, and go home for a little while before moving to Australia I would have to say goodbye to my Wrangler. I was devistated, I felt like I truly closed a chapter in my life by giving her away. 


Friday May 13th 2016
Weekend get away to Cardiff Wales with my Australian neighbour Jessie and Kiwi friend Lottie to couch surf, bar hop and check out the Welsh markets.

Friday May 20th 2016
Four days spent in Mykonos Greece with my Canadian bestie Morgan to soak up some European sun and drive four wheelers around the island while intoxicated .. just doing what the greek do.

Thursday May 26th 2016
Four days spent in Morocco, Africa camel riding and quading through the desert with Jessie and Lottie.

Thursday June 9th 2016
Come September my host parents originally knew when they hired me that I would have to go back to Canada for a few weeks to take part in my cousins wedding. They assume I will be staying with them until December when my 1 year contract ends, but I know once I go home for "two weeks" in September there's no way I'll want to return. In the mean time I had done a fair amount of planning. I applied for my Australian visa and booked my flight to Brisbane. September 23rd I would be back on Aussie soil once again. 


Saturday June 11th 2016
My host family is travelling to Spain for the week, so fortunatley I have the week off. I asked for additional days off since the following week family members from Canada would be in Portugal. I spent 4 days in Romania visiting my fathers side of the family, 5 days on my own in Barcelona and 12 days in Lisbon with my Aunts, Uncles and cousins from my mothers side. The first time I've seen any family in 1 year.


Sunday July 3rd 2016
After returning from Lisbon, I had everything planned in my head to tell my host parents that I'm leaving. That after spending time with my Aunts, Uncles and cousins, I'm missing my family and have decided I want to go home. It was easiest to tell them I was home sick rather than pin point every single thing that has been bothering me over the past 6 months. I would have loved to put them in their place, but I live here. I can't escape the awkwardness at the end of the day after such confrontation. Easier said than done.

Wednesday July 6th 2016
It only took a few days for my host parents to turn on me after giving my notice which they initially responded with "we're so sorry you're feeling this way. You have to do what's best for you." They forced me into purchasing my flight home on the spot so they knew which day I was leaving. Removed the wifi router from the basement so I couldn't use the internet. "Forgot" to pick me up groceries from the supermarket. What did I do that was so wrong? You're angry with me that you actually have to be a parent now? That you can't go out drinking every night and make me stay home and babysit for you? If that's seriously the case, just hire another Au Pair or are you that lazy that this time around you'll have to look for someone unlike me conveniently landing on your door step.  


Monday June 25th 2016
My host mum approached me saying she needed to talk to me about something. She explained that next week as I would only be working 4 days due to the fact that I fly home Friday morning, I wouldn't be receiving my last weeks pay because I have taken 15/20 days paid holiday when technically within 7 months I should have only taken 11.Even if "technically" I owed them 4 days, what about all of the days I worked through my 2 hour break, or worked 3 free nights of babysitting when I'm only suppose to do only 2 nights. Along with styling my host mums hair for her every night she goes out, not because I wanted to. Do they not think that even as a thank you for all my extra work they would just cancel that out? Because If I properly added up how much they owed me, it would be worth much more than the 4 days they think I owe them. There was no way I was going to stand for that. I replied, stating all of the above, and added that "If you decide not to pay my next week, I will find accomdation else where until my flight next Friday." After discussing this issue with her husband, my host mum returned to me saying they had agreed to pay me. Not that they wanted to, but I clearly won the battle. It wasn't even about the money. It was that I wanted them to realise all my hard work had gone unnoticed and unappreciated. It has been so difficult keeping everything a secret from my parents and brother. They have no idea that I gave my notice and booked my flight home. I decided that my arrival home would be a surprise. There was no point in stressing them out in a situation where there was nothing they could do. It was a battle I had to fight on my own. Although it left me every day feeling like a puppy with my tail between my legs, walking up the stairs every morning with my head down thinking to myself, here we go again, what will today have in store. Every day was such a struggle to get through, for a job that simply wasn't worth it. This time around, I had such a great relationship with the children, it's going to break my heart leaving them. I raised them, I was their mother. But the treatment from the parents, and living here, never being able to escape work or have any privacy .. is unbareable. It's like living with shitty roommates that you have to work for, make you clean up after them and look after their children without any appreciation and seeing how much they can get away with. I'm so over it.


Thursday July 28th 2016
I've been making sure to keep myself busy during my remaining time here in London. Taking the train to Brighton Pier for the day, going for picnics in the park, enjoying the busy city, experiencing the nightlife which I really wasn't able to do over the past year, etc. I truly do love this city. For what it was worth, I will actually miss it.


Friday August 5th 2016
Today, I fly back to Canada. My home. To surprise my friends and family. A place I haven't stepped foot for 12 months and two weeks. Walking away from this experience, aside from all the unnecessary drama that I went through, I can say that I made the most amazing friends from all over the world that I can't picture my life without. I met an amazing guy, who I can't wait to see again once I get back to Australia. I visited 24 countries and backpacked to some of them on my own. I travelled to Asia, alone, to scubba dive and hike mountains in Thailand, and most recently, I rode camels and spent the night in African Sahara Desert. Trips that people will never get the chance to do in a life time, I did in just 12 months. I experienced terrorism for the first time, and witnessed other tragic events that just don't occur in the amazing country that I come from. I walked through the streets of Paris where blood still remained on the pavement from the devistating attack that killed nearly 100 people just days prior to me entering the country. I visited the home where Anne Frank hid during the War in Amsterdam. I stood in the exact spot where Hitler took a bullet to the head in Berlin Germany. I walked through the gas chambers that murdered millions of Jews at the concetration camps in Poland. I watched children get beat and beg for food in the streets of Marrakesh. To be present and greatly impacted by examples such as these, you walk away from it all a completley different person. It's now that I have to take a step back and look at my experience abroad as a whole and think to myself, after everything I've witnessed over this past year, I have nothing to complain about. That taking on a job that I hated and felt like a "daily struggle" was a walk in the park for someone else. I'm selfish, but I'm also human. Would it have been easier for me to remain in Canada working in the salon for the rest of my life instead of moving to England and going through this year long struggle of highs and lows? Hell yeah it would have been easier. But I would have never proved to myself how much I'm capable of. In one way I feel like over this past year someone has played a joke on me, yet in another way I feel as someone blessed me with the opporunity to see the world. This has been the most toxic yet fulfilling years of my life, but now I know I can conquer anything. The most important thing I learned was no matter what situation I'm in, I will always stand up for what I believe in. I will never let someone take advantage of me, I will always choose happiness, over everything.